As a writer I’m used to disappointments. At this stage in my career their seem to be more rejections then things to celebrate. Over the years I’ve experienced the anxiousness that comes with wanting to be published so bad it physically hurts and then having that dream stripped away like a crusted over scab and having to start the healing process all over again.
I’m at a place in my career that I’m okay with what God wants to do in my writing life and I’m seriously enjoying NOT being on a deadline, but it’s hard to watch my children go through similar disappointments.
My fourteen year old is a very gifted singer, actor and musician. I noticed he had a good ear and could sing when he was two and made up his on words to a familiar tune and sung on key. I searched for music lessons and enrolled him at age four in a musical theatre class. It was fun watching him on stage and seeing his perfectionism with the words and moves come out. But he didn’t always love it. So I let him take breaks, only signing him up for class every other year. I knew he had gift from God and I wanted to nurture that gift without exasperating him.
I remember his first audition because he never made it out of the car. The show was Oliver and he was about eight years old. That was the first of many auditions where I would pull my hair out in frustration over my reluctant performer. Each year he got a little better, but inevitably he’d pull a last minute “I’m not auditioning.” I remember the first show he got was Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dream Coat. If his six year old brother hadn’t of auditioned first, he might not have made it through the door.
That was more than half a dozen auditions ago. Some parts he got and some parts he didn’t when I thought he should have. Each time we went in knowing if it was God’s will, then he’d get the part and several times he didn’t make a call back but then was later called in for a part.
He’s at that place again. He auditioned for his school play and there’s no doubt the boy can sing and act, but he didn’t make a call back. I’m probably not being bias if I say that many of the kids who got call backs weren’t as gifted as my son and that he probably could sing better than most of them. He was surprised he didn’t get a call back. The kids who auditioned with him were surprised he didn’t get a call back. We both were frustrated he didn’t get a call back.
There’s a lot of speculation as to why. One boy who auditioned with him thinks it’s because they probably cast him in the part he wanted. I’m not so sure because I’m thinking there’s a sort of seniority that goes on at this school. I’ve heard last year that the main parts are given to the high schoolers and my son is in junior high. He’s been very gracious in saying that if another kid was as good as him or even almost as good as him and was a senior, he’d want that other kid to get the part. My maternal heart beams at this, but is also torn. I wanted it to be a fair fight (maybe it was) but it would at least have been easier to understand if he got a call back.
Still nothing is settled and we’ll have to wait the loooong weekend to find out on Monday who they actually cast.
(On another note, my younger son did get a call back. I would have been surprised if he didn’t, though I’m not totally sure I want him to play the part he already played once before. Here I’m having the gracious heart and wondering if another kid should be allowed to play the part if my son gets it!)
UPDATE: Spoke with one of the judges and was told that my son did great but there is a school policy that the high schoolers get first dibs on the parts and with as much talent as our school has, my son is not in line for a main part. Seems like the role he got last year was very unprecedented at his school, but there was no other person who could play the part. But the directors are very excited for the next four years. My son will be in high school.