I can’t believe it’s show time again. Well, not action show time, but audition for their school’s production of The Music Man is tomorrow. Their small Classical Christian school is non for is top notch performances which is great, but also means there’s a chance they might not get the big parts they are getting used to getting. But they don’t really mind. They just want to have fun with all their friends.

They went to a workshop last Saturday which was fun. Then I saw the rehearsal schedule. Not so fun! They will be practicing Tuesday and Thursdays from 3- 6pm which is better than the last show they were in which was from 7-9pm, but on Tuesdays and Thursdays they get out at 1:30pm. I really don’t want to run home for an hour and then run back, plus I have to pick up Grace at 2:45 at her school. So I’m not quite sure how that’s all going to work out yet. But the worse part of the practices is that they have them also on Saturday morning from 9-noon!

I guess this schedule isn’t any worse than Chris’ schedule last year playing baseball (which he missed tryouts because they were last month! Last month?) But he said he doesn’t even watch Saturday morning cartoons anymore. Which really just means he’s excited about this show.

The only big concern I have is that Chris’ grades might suffer. His grades went down several points in some subjects when he was doing Narnia, but he reminded me that at least he won’t be getting to bed late and he can do his homework after practice. As it is he spends all his time in his room doing homework when he gets home from school. I asked him today which he liked better homeschool with no homework or school with friends.

He said, “When I was homeschooled I had lots of time to play but no friends to play with. At school I have no time to play, but lots of friends.”

I was thinking how much I’ve been enjoying Chris (13) this year and how agreeable he’s been, hardly arguing about things I ask him to do. It’s night and day compared to when we homeschooled. In fact, so much in this family has change since I’ve put them in school. I have really changed. I have more peace. More patience and I’m able to handle stress better. I still spend too much time on the computer, but I’m working on it.

Still, I’ll thinking about bringing Timmy home next year for 3rd grade. I really don’t have a good reason why. His teacher adores him and he loves his friends (not the work.) He gets great grades, but I’d still like to have him home and homeschool him. I miss sitting down as a family reading about science and history which they don’t get enough of in a fun way at school. And I think it would be more fun to homeschool Grace with Timmy. Yes, I’m planning on homeschooler her (God help me! I really mean it!) But I think it’s the best thing for her. Not sure if it’s the best thing for me.

So that’s the update on the family. I really wish I was able to be that laid back, homeschooled, Charolette Mason, unschooler, but God didn’t design me that way. I’m not sure if I’ve totally given up that dream, yet, but the way I feel now compared to the way we all felt homeschooling is undescribable. I feel like Job after God restored all he had lost.

Hey, that sounds like the makings of a really good devotional. I’ll have to give it some thought!

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Even before I homeschooled I was always looking for fun, educational games for my kids. When my oldest was 2, he started playing computer games, but they weren’t the frivolous games he plays now on ps2 or the Wii. They were educational. He started out with games like Bailey’s Book House which taught letters and reading and Millie’s Math House which introduced numbers and counting.

When he got a little older I started selling Discovery Toys just so I could get the toys. We played, my children learned and often times when I homeschooled we used the phonics and other educational games as school. Those were the days I really enjoyed homeschooling. I think my kids did as well.

Even though I’m not officially homeschooling, I still gravitate toward the learning games. So when I got my samples of Cranium Bloom in the mail I was excited. We immediately opened the attractive packages and started to play.

Cranium Bloom’s Let’s Play and Cook caught my eye instantly with the fun chef movers and Cook Book. The object of the game was to collect tokens to make a recipe which includes spaghetti and meatballs, PBJ, and chocolate chip cookies to name a few. Through out the recipe cards there are kitchen safety tips, a table setting guide, and even a fun way to tell how old an egg was.

I played it with my 5, 7 and 10year old who really got mad when he didn’t win. Maybe it was my added incentive of the winner gets a cookie that helped him get into the game.

The ages for this game says 3 and up, though I can see younger kids who like to play games loving this one. Even though this is a preschool game, it lends itself to talking about healthy food choices, especially when you get to choose a different ingredient to add to your recipe.

While this isn’t a strategic game, (though my 10 year old figured out how he could avoid getting a token to win the game), it is a great little addition to your game library. In fact, I’ll be teaching a homeschool family about nutrition and organic foods and this game would be a perfect way to end the class. The game retails for $12.99 and you can order it at my store here! 

Another fun product we tested was the Seek & Find Let’s Go to the Zoo puzzle. It reminded me of a cross between Where’s Waldo and The Usborne’s Seek & Find Books. But what I loved about the Cranium version is that it’s not just a seek & find book. It’s a puzzle (hand’s on which I love) and it has challenge cards which ask you to find certain things like 3 parrots, something that’s red. So not only is your child enhancing her visual skills, she’s also learning counting and numbers. Plus there is a dry erase pen that helps with fine motor coordination because she gets to circle what she finds.

From the manufacturer:

Cranium Bloom, a new product line developed by Cranium specifically for preschoolers, allows parents an innovative way to engage their little ones’ minds through play and an organic approach to learning that celebrates the whole child - an elegant solution to the quandary of blending play with active learning. The Cranium Bloom line includes games that awaken your child’s imagination to neighborhood sounds, shopping at the grocery store or cooking in your kitchen; activity books designed to be used while you and your child are out and about, engaging you both with the things you see
around you; and pretend play toys for everything from taking care of a puppy to creating and sending mail to each other.

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It took me a while to get this program installed because I’ve been busy with the holidays and for some reason it had trouble finding the page when I used Firefox, but it worked in Internet Explorer. Go figure! I’m not a computer genius, but I finally got it installed.

My husband said it was a HUGE file which to me translates TONS of information! I’ve played around with the Math section and though I have no clue about math nowadays, the program seems simple enough with a “Math tool box” which contains categories like the Equation Solver, Formulas and Equations, Triangle Solver and Unit Conversion Tool. Just click on a category and everything you need to solve your problem is there. Though Parents BEWARE. I can definitely see this as a homework DOER not just as a HELPER. When I played with it in front of Chris, my 7th grader, he reprimanded me for CHEATING by finding the answer to a made up equation.

Math isn’t the only thing Microsoft Student has. It’s contains all the subjects your children study in school like science, history, geography, languages, writing and a place for fun learning. Though it seems geared for junior high and high school, my 5th grader looked up the explorers he’s been studying at school and they were there all nicely packaged with photos and links to other information.

Chris especially liked the 3D tour of an ancient tomb and castle. If it wasn’t bed time he would have “played” on the computer a little longer. I can see Joey, my 5th grader, using this just for fun! He’s my little sponge. He can never get enough information and I can’t seem to keep him supplied with the answers. The next time he asks a question I will feel great about telling him to look it up online. Microsoft Student makes it easy and fun with all the subjects and information at a glance.

I even found some fun games my kindergartener and second grader can use. I tried to assemble an insect and got it wrong. I’ll have to ask my little ones to help me next time!

My children haven’t had to spend a whole lot of time on line searching for information, but this will definitely help them when they do. Last time my son was looking for information on someone in history several links popped up that were not appropriate for him to see, including a photo! The guy he was looking up seemed to have the same name as someone in recent news. With the Microsoft student software and Encarta Online Encyclopedia, I won’t have to worry about my children stumbling upon things they shouldn’t when they’re using the Internet for school.

Here are what others are saying!

“As our teens trek home with increasingly heavy homework loads, we sometimes feel helpless as they tackle advanced assignments late into the night. After sports, school, or music practice, junior high and high school homework can be a daunting task, and we parents cannot always be a dependable resource (I can’t remember the last time I had to do algebra!). For your teens, Microsoft Student offers a perfect solution to this parental dilemma.”

As Mom Expert Rachel Hamman has said, “If only a tool like this existed when I was in school! Microsoft Student is an amazing homework aid, which sets itself apart from anything out there. It provides my daughter with tutorials on math, science and foreign languages. If you are like me, it’s been a few years since you’ve done quadratic equations or solved for “x” and this product fills in when your own knowledge is not adequate. The program also provides templates for creating comprehensive presentations. Microsoft Student utilizes Encarta Online Encyclopedia, which has links to 25,000 prescreened, age-appropriate websites, where I can rest assured that I’m getting factual and accurate information. Microsoft Student has allowed my daughter to spend less time seeking for information and enables her to spend more time learning!”

We’ve only started using it at our home, but I have a feeling the boys will be fighting over using it. In fact, this would have been awesome to have while homeschooling! So all you homeschoolers out there, go and check it out. But remember to use Internet Explorer if the link comes up wrong when you click on the Microsoft Student with Encarta link!

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It’s already the end of the quarter, the boys, Grace and I have settled into a nice routine. The house is virtually stress free from the hours between 8am and 3pm and everyone is thriving!

At first school was an adjustment, mostly for Joey (5th grade) who has to have all his ducks lined up in row. In a class of five, he is acing every subject now and has earned the nicname “Apple” as in Apple comupter. I think his lowest report card grade was a 96 the highest a 105 and he says most of what he’s learning in school is a review. But he’s where he needs to be and he really needs this year to help boost his selfesteem.

Chris (7th) is fitting in well with this group of kids. He already has a best friend (which we prayed for) and though at times he still feels like the knew kids, Chris is basically happy and smiling a lot! Which wasn’t happening at home. He got all As and one C in pre Algebra. He was really upset about that one, but then told us it was before he figured out what he was doing wrong. For a kid who was slight ADHD, he’s the one who everyone calls to find out what the homework is. I rarely have to get on him to complete an assignment, though he is still having trouble with the concept of having to finish his homework before Sunday.

Timmy (2nd) loves his friends, doesn’t care for doing work at school. He got all As except in phonics he got a B. He still struggling with cursive, and doesn’t like to do extra writing, but he still does it and got all Es in character on his report card.

Grace (K) is doing well also, though I can tell she’s less focused on school work than her brothers were. She’s learning to read at school and home and often guesses at the letter sounds. I can already see we’ll need to switch curriculums next year for my distracted learner.

And me, I’m hanging in there, getting up early almost every morning, enjoying the peace of exercising without a houseful of chaos and really enjoying spending time with Grace.  I don’t get to see the boys a whole lot since after school they go do their homework, but the time we do spend together is not spent in heartache and anguish.

I go on all the field trips and am involved in all the school activities which is one thing I DO NOT like about having them in school. Too much to do, not enough time still do the things I need to do at home like write!

So overall this year is going much better, though I do miss the good times, I also know it is better for them to be where they are then to be at home. It’s hard and sad for me to admit that school is the best thing for them, but as long as our relationship is strong and growing, then that’s all that matters!

There are times I miss sleeping in and the lazy days of homeshooling, but I’ve traded in my sleep for peace and it’s been worth it.

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Chris (13) left this morning with his entire junior and senior high on an overnight retreat. Everyone assures me that when they come back on Friday afternoon, you can’t tell the new from the old students.

I know Chris will have a great time! He’s not shy, though not overly friendly, but isn’t afraid to experience new things. I’m looking forward to hearing how things go for him.

It’s been a trying week for him waking up early (he’s used to sleeping in until 10 am and now gets up at 7). He’s been one of the only ones to wear shorts to school, but he’s got a good head on his shoulder and doesn’t care what the other kids are doing. He’s not swayed by peer pressure, though he realizes the kids probably wear pants because it’s cold in school!

He’s been sitting alone in the lunch room, mainly because he gets there first and no one sits down with him. I’ve encouraged him not to sit down first and then join someone else. But he doesn’t mind sitting alone either. In fact, when he was in first grade he would move away from the other boys to eat because they would talk and spit when they ate, and Chris didn’t want them spraying his food.

Chris’ has been moody the last couple of days. He just got contacts which he’s physched about, but he has trouble putting them in and getting them out. He ripped two contacts and lost one already. Good thing they’re dailies! He got them in this moring with my husbands’ help. I just hope he can get them out at camp tonight!

The Splitting Storm by Rene Gutteridge is one of her early suspenses, but a great read! If you’d like to own it, leave a comment!

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On the second day of school, Joey (10) comes to me after bedtime. He looks sad and distraught and starts off by saying, “I don’t know if I should tell you this or not because you might say something and I don’t want you to.”

I immediately think he’s having trouble with a kid at school. Turns out, he’s having trouble with his teacher. He’s feeling frustrated and overwhelmed by the differences between homeschooling and school.

Here I thought he’d be the one that would love it and be well adjusted, but it turns out he’s having a hard time with the rules. He says he feels like his teacher is getting on him about lots of things and that he doesn’t even know what the rules are.

Some things he’s been corrected on have been, sitting improperly in his desk chair. (He’s used to doing school work sprawled out on the floor) He’s interrupted once or twice at school and in the lunch room he was called over by the teacher because he kept getting up and down at the lunch table. He felt very embarrassed that she called him over.

Right about now I’m starting to feel guilty. Joey’s teacher is really sweet and during our pre-school conference she asked me what she wanted her to work on with Anthony. I mentioned he talks a lot and might need some help with interrupting. That we’re trying to teach him life isn’t always fair, but it’s how you deal with things that matters. We also mentioned he’s been going through a whinny stage. So I’m thinking maybe I brought this on my son!

He also mentioned being confused during a science lesson because his teacher said Molecules make up atoms and said the water atom was made up of a 2 hydrogen and 1 oxygen molecule. Joey said that I taught him that atoms make up molecules. To tell you the truth, atoms and molecules confuse me so I wasn’t sure which was correct.

Now I’ve learned that when I question something Joey usually is right. Once he hears something, he remembers it. But we went to my homeschool books and lo and behold, he was right. The hydrogen atom makes up the water molecule. But how does he go and tell his teacher she was wrong. BTW, she had confided in me that one of the teachers had challenged her to do more in science so I told Joey science wasn’t her best subject, but Joey can’t understand how a teacher doens’t know everything.

So he could really use your prayers right now. It’s only the second day of school, but he feels like an outsider. His closing words to me were, “school is not like I imagined it.” I could relate. Homeschool wasn’t what I imagined either.

I guess I didn’t prepare him enough for school. I just thought he’d love it. I told him how just because it hurts sometimes doesn’t mean it’s not God’s plan. (Hope I got that double negative thing right. I guess if I woke up Joey and asked him, he’d know!) I went on to explain a diamond is just a lump of coal until it goes in the furnace and comes out shining. (He questioned my diamond theory and made me think twice about it, but I stuck to my analogy.) I told him, maybe this was God’s way of making him shine. Then I held him, and let him cry in my arms. We ended with a prayer and I said, “I promise things will get better.”

He looked at me through tear filled eyes and smiled. “Mom, don’t promise things you can’t deliver.”

But somehow, I know things will get better!

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I woke up at 6:30 and jumped in the shower ready to start the first day of school off right. After waking the older boys with a “flash” (I took photos) they eventually made it out of be and everyone made it down stairs for breakfast fully dressed and with teeth already brushed.

I cooked eggs and we had left over pancakes. My husband even did a small devotion and the only real issues we had was that Joey got upset because there wasn’t a lot of orange juice left.

We planned on leaving at 7:30, but by the time we gathered up everyone and their supplies, it was 7:45. Then we hit traffic and I started to panic, but decided they’d probably give everyone grace on the first day of school.

We arrived at 8:00 and my husband took the older two to their classes. He said Chris was the last one to arrive and had to sit in the front row, which he wasn’t happy about. I settled Timmy into his second grade class and witnessed tears coming from a couple of girls. Timmy was all smiles and settled in quickly. He even gave me a kiss before I left! So glad he’s still little.

It’s 10:00 am now and I’ve had a quiet morning doing laundry and playing games and puzzles with Grace. Our dog seems to notice the quiet. I know I do. I keep wondering what the boys are doing at this very moment. A part of me is sad that they’re gone, but a part of me knows that this is what it’s going to take to restore peace into this family. It’s sad that things don’t always work out how I would have liked it to. My heart still wants them home, but not the way it has been for the last three years. I think in our family absense will make the heart grow fonder.

I already think it has for this momma!

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We visited the boys school for orientation the other day. Joey (10) is really excited about school. He’ll be one of five in a class room, and I’m thrilled that he’ll be getting so much individual attention and chances to answer and participate. We’ve already had the talk about not hogging the answers and let others answer once in a while. Mrs. Weir, his teacher, has already asked me for input in writing which isn’t her strength, and I’m thrilled to participate in that area and have such a hands on approach in my son’s education. Since they’ll be learing American History, I told her I’ve written a couple of plays and she’s already planning on how she can put on those class productions.

Timmy (7) is a little reluctant about going to school. He’s only been to preschool, and when we pulled up to the school he stated he didn’t want to go. But once he saw his class, and got to meet some of the boys he got excited. It’s going to be the hardest to let go of him, but I know this is the best thing for the family next year. I’m already secretly planning on homeschooling him for 3rd grade, but we’ll see what God has planned.

I’m excited about the opportunity the boys have to be in excellent productions. We met the drama teacher, introduced her to my boys and shared their experience in theatre. The main production in the spring will be the Music Man and the teacher mentioned to Joey that she’s looking for a Winthrop, so he needs to work on his lisp!

Chris will be in 7th grade next year and we’re going to visit his teachers tonight. I’ll post an update after the meeting!

UPDATE:

I think Chris is excited about school. It starts on Monday, and we’ve already met his teachers and found his classes. He’ll be going on an over nighter to a retreat center on Thursday morning and all day Friday with the entire junior high and high school student body and staff!

He’s looking forward to making new friends and being a part of the Falcon House. The junior and senior is divided into four houses and compete in attendance, academics, sports, character, etc. and it’s a great way for the older students to mentor the younger ones.

I’m so excited about this new season in our lives. Chris was the reason we started homeschooling and he’s matured so  much in three years. I’m really glad I had him home (despite the struggles) because now he’s ready to be out on his own and I know without a doubt he will succeed!

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It’s almost hard to believe last year this time I was busy planning, organizing and fretting about homeschool. This year I have different worries.

Did I get all the school supplies on their list?

I still have to go uniform shopping.

Will I finish the summer phonics lessons before school starts?

That’s right all four will be going to a private school this year. God has taken me an 180 degree turn in the last year. I didn’t even want to consider sending them back to school, but when it became really clear that it didn’t matter what I wanted. I needed to do what was right for them and our family.

And for this next year and probably several years after, school is where they should be. My oldest has really matured in the last couple of years that I’m not at all worried about him being in school and misbehaving. My ten year old really needs to be away from his brother, in a positive environment where he can show off and excell in what he’s good at, which happens to be academics.

The hardest one to let go of is my soon to be second grader. He’s been to preschool, but I homeschooled him for K-1st. I would like more time with him, but at least this school lets them get out by 1:30 on Tuesdays and Thursdays! Timmy is really smart, but being home has stifled his education in a way. He’d much rather play than work. I know he will florish at school and he’s such a social kid, he’ll make friends quickly. His biggest fear is that he’ll go to the principal’s office. (Guess he overheard me saying he wasn’t a good student…meaning he didn’t sit still and do his work, but he’s okay and excited now that I assured him he won’t go to the principal’s office)

God answered my prayers and we got Grace in a two day a week Kindergarten. It wasn’t my first choice, but I’m thrilled to not have to teach her math and phonics, but still get ot supplement with fun games. She’ll be going on Tues. and Thrus. just like she did in preschool and I’ll even have a couple of hours to myself on those days!

Sure I will miss the good parts of homeschooling, but for our family unfortunately the bad out weighed the good. Still I am a homeschooling mama at heart and will always be teaching my kids above and beyond the school curriculum and dragging them to museums and such!

I just won’t have the day to day headache! I’m looking foward to being just a mom this Fall!

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Reposted from September 2004
Well, I can’t believe we’ve been schooling for over a month now. While I’m adjusting to not have any free time to myself, falling down exhausted in the bed at 2 pm and staying up late at night preparing lessons, my boys aren’t adjusting so quickly. Joey (7) has daily bouts of whining fits and Chris (10) has trouble following simple instructions and often interrupts and blurts out answers for his brother. (But isn’t that one of the reasons I decided to homeschool?)

If it wasn’t for the daily struggles, battles and screaming fits of anger, school would be going great! I must admit at my lowest, I’ve threatened to put my kids in public school something they don’t want to do. But they’d love to go back to their old private school. They miss the specials and FUN! But they don’t realize yet that there are benefits to homeschooling, like skipping Math and grammar lessons they already know, not having homework, going on outings in the middle of the day and I can go on and on… sleeping in!

We’re actually going on a field trip with friends today and have been on several outings with other friends, but I do admit I have to make the daily stuff a little more fun and I have to realize when my boys get overwhelmed with a task I’ve given them. But it’s a learning process and thought there are more bad days than good days, I will persist knowing that THIS TOO SHALL PASS!

Three years later and it’s still not PASSING! I’m just struggling with a different set of homeschoolers. Timmy is fighting his summer phonics lessons like he did all year. That’s one of the reasons we’re still doing phonics this summer!

For three years I threatened to send them back to school. Never did! But this Fall they will be going to school, but not because of threats. Because I feel it’s the next step in their schooling and our relationship!

I will miss the sleeping in (so will Chris.) I will miss the afternoon outings (though the boys get out at 1:30 on Tuesdays and Thursdays) and I will miss having no homework to follow up on. Yet, we will adjust. One thing my boys are is flexible! When they’re full grown, nothing will be able to stand in their way. We’ve done it all and they’ll be able to adapt to it all! At least that’s my prayer!

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Reposted from September 2004
Aside from battling some attitudes, school is going okay. We’ve been at it for about three weeks and I think the hardest part has been my 2 and 4 year old. I still haven’t figured out how to balance time with them because it seems now they are being neglected of mommy time while I spend almost all my time with the tow older ones.

Another difficulty is adjusting to staying up later just to prepare a lesson for the next day. I’ve also run into problems with teaching grammar. Right now it’s all review for my 4th grader and my 2nd grader is picking it up quickly, but there’s no time in the day to do 2 separate lessons. My oldest is already doing Saxon Math by himself. Right now it’s all review, but I’m sure he’ll need my help soon. So I can’t figure out how homeschoolers get everything in before noon. I’m reworking my schedule to spend time in the morning with my little ones while the older boys do work they don’t need any help with. Then when my two year old is ready for her morning crib play time, I can go into more detailed lessons. Right now the two little ones go to preschool 2 days a week and they love it. I’m getting a lot of work done with the older ones, but tend to try and cram things in fearing I have to make it up for the slack on Monday, Wednesday and Friday.

I have to admit I’ve let my temper fly already, especially when dealing with all four of my kids. It’s just tough keeping the little one occupied without me feeling like I’m neglecting them or sitting them in front of the t.v. all day long. Oh well, it’s only been three weeks.

So far my kids like it except they miss recess with their friends and they don’t like mom yelling. I guess I’ll have to work harder in those areas.

I wonder how long it takes homeschoolers to settle into a schedule. Every year it changed for us. Though I still held on to th guilt of neglecting the little ones. When the older ones were their age, they had mommy’s undivided attention.

I’m looking forward to spending more time with Grace and Timmy next year. Although Timmy might be in school longer than I hoped, I’m sure he won’t have a ton of homework and I’ll be able to play with them after school! I’m looking forward to being just a mom again. Though I know I’ll still have to wrangle homework assignments and guide them in studying for tests. It’ll be a new an exciting year! And I’m ready for a change!

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Reposted from August 2004Well, it’s August and school is just around the corner. Several schools went back last week and more go this coming week. I’m pretty much ready to start schooling from an organizational standpoint, but I want to wait until after labor day. I grew up on the East coast and I just couldn’t catch on to the Midwestern idea of starting school in August. To me August is still summer time.

Anyway, to get me and the kids ready for school we started doing a little bit each day last week. I started with some fun brainteaser work sheets, added a little math the next day and then spelling the next. I’m trying to wake up their brains from the long summer break and introduce them to things we’ll be doing during school. Next week I’ll try to add Bible in the morning and I really want to be consistent with it. My two youngest start preschool in two weeks and that’s when I’ll have a run through of the days subjects to see if there are any kinks in the scheduling.

Chris, my fourth grader, has already whined and complained about some assignments I’ve given him, but for the most part he’s been motivated by the sticker chart and ability to earn prizes. I just have to figure on an approriate reward system and be consistent. But that’s what this week is for also. Our character study for this week or month or however long it takes is Obedience. If I see them displaying first time obedience or obedience with a happy heart, they get a sticker. They can earn a prize after 5 stickers or combine their stickers for bigger prizes like these neat videos I found at the dollar store.

I know we’ll have our good days and our bad days… in fact at the beginning of the week we had three good days and then two bad days. I just hope the good out weigh the bad. I’m also slowly weaning them off of food with artificial colors and flavors in hope of reducing their hyperactivity and unpredictable behavior. If looked into the Feingold diet when Chris was in first grade but never followed through with it. It means I’ll be doing a lot more cooking and baking and relying less on fast food and prepackaged chips and snacks, but it’s worth a try.

Sigh! I was really an idealistic homeschooler when I started out. I made so many wonderful plans and attacked school hard the first year. I still can’t believe what I made Joey (then 2nd grade) do. I wouldn’t even consider making Timmy (going into 2nd grade) do all the writing I made Joey do. But Joey seemed older academically at the time and Timmy is less motivated and seems younger to me. I guess that just proves each child is different and that’s the great thing about homeschooling.

Will I miss all the cool homeschool stuff like the good days when we dug into history and everything just clicked? Yes, absolutely. But I won’t miss the stress and tears. I wish I could have been the homeschooler who just loves to homeschool and be with her children 24/7 and longs for lesson planning. But that’s not me and I’m finally okay with it.

Maybe homeschooling will be apart of our future again. (Sooner than I hope if I homeschool Grace for kindergarten) But if it’s not, that’s okay. I can still be a great mom, supplementing their education like I have always done! I’m okay with letting go of the control. In fact, I’m looking forward to it!

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This was written three years ago when I had abandoned one “authoritative” parenting philosophy that advocated spanking and tried to go the “non-punitive” route. What I’ve learned since is that the Holy Spirit should be your guide in disciplining your children, not a book!

Reposted from June 2007

Believe it or not yesterday, Chris(9) was the good son except for the vitamin incident. He absolutely hates the taste of the chewables and chokes on the swallowing ones. But after crying and arguing we managed to get some of them down. Later on Joey (9) and Timmy (4) had me pulling my hair out. I just wish the kids would give me a little break to recuperate before the next disaster comes along. I just wish I could “discipline positively” or be a “gentle mother.” But with four high maintanance kids who go from happy to hysterical with no warning in between and with no family support and very little if any friend support… and dear old hubby is most often oblivious to how crazy the kids get me (though he sees my reactions sometimes) I just don’t see how this disciplining without “punishment” will work in my family.

My kids have started saying “NO” to me and running away when I’m talking and my 4 year old is the worse. Consequences don’t seem to be changing the behaviors. But when they spend time alone in their rooms, (dare I say it… Time out), they emerge happy and gentle kids once again. Then I am able to talk with them and connect. When my kids are angry, they don’t want to go to the cuddle corner or be held. They want what they want when they want it and if they don’t get it they continue to whine and scream and say “No! First give me *****and then I’ll stop whining.” And because I don’t give it to them I end up raising my voice at them for whining and not going to their room…yada, yada, yada..Get my point!

Sorry to drone on… but this parenting thing is just so hard! More and more I’m resorting to yelling like my mother did just because I have no time to catch my breath and do what I need to do to control my reactions to my children. Last night I decided to put them on a strict summer schedule so there won’t be any surprises. I told them if they’re not on task, there will be consequences. I said, “When it’s time to do morning chores, you do morning chores and when it’s time to play, you play.” Joey looked at me with a playful gleam in his eye and said, “So do you mean if I’m not playing when it says to play, I get consequences?” The little stinker!

Those playful moments are the moments I live for… all the rest I can do without… or at least do with a little less of.

Wow! I’m so glad I’m over feeling guilty about punishing my kids. It was a crazy, rocky time in my life where I was listening to all kinds of parenting advice from the Attachment Parenting group which is sooo not me, though I wish it were!

Plus, I had a hard time choosing only Grace based discipline over punitive discipling. I believe God uses both types. Take the Garden of Eden for instance. If that’s not an example of punishment, read further on and you can see more examples. Sure, Jesus came to give us Grace, but I still believe he uses punishment (our own natural consequence) to teach us right from wrong.

I happy to say my parenting style has change. I offer grace much more than I did in the past, but I also make sure there are consequences that fit the crime. And lessons to be learned.

One thing that hasn’t changed is that my children overwhelm me. I still lose my cool. But as always, I try to apologize and sit them down for reconnection!

So my lessons learned on this is that no two families should parent alike and no two kids should be disciplined the same. I should consult the Holy Spirit in guiding my parenting on a daily basis. And it’s okay to glean advice from different camps! (My current book of choice is Heartfelt Discipline!)

Whatever works to help raise kids into Christ following, loving adults is success in my book!

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Reposted From June 2004

I picked up Chris (9) from camp on Wednesday morning and I was really glad to see him. It was obvious he had fun, yet there were some tough moments which I will share later. After he was home a day or so I began to realize how peaceful the house was without him. I know that must really sound bad, but even though I worried a little about him I didn’t miss the arguing and struggles we seem to have on a daily basis. Without him to add to the chaos of our home, things actually ran smoothly.On Friday I had to take him to the doctor because his tonsils were hurting him (they hurt him all during camp). I said the doctor wouldn’t stick anything down his throat. (Last time the doctor looked at his throat and gave him an antibiotic.) Well, this time the doctor needed a swab.Now Chris is petrified when it comes to anything causing him pain, especially from the doctor. When he was 2 years old it took 3 doctors to hold him down while he got stitches in his head. Every doctor visit results in anxiety attacks from him, and me saying I’m never taking him to the doctor again. Well this time was no different. He freaked when the nurse needed to swab his throat because it makes him gag. It took about 30 minutes and many threats that the doctor would have to do it himself (the nurse is much gentler than the doctor). Chris’d say he’d let her do it, but would back down. The nurse had to leave to take care of other patients and finally after I pleaded and cried out of shear frustration, he reluctantly said she could do it.

The nurse came back in and Chris cringed and backed down and found the courage and opened his mouth a little and gaged alot and the nurse got one tonsil but needed the other. After a while she barely touched the other and the test came back negative for strep. Needless to say, my patience for him the rest of the day was non existence.

Sunday, Grace (2) was a nightmare at the restuarant durnig lunch. We should have known better than to take her out to eat in public. We went to a buffet on Mother’s Day and the only thing that made the afternoon bareable was that I didn’t have to cook. She doesn’t sit in her highchair and when she’s done eating she climbs out of the chair and runs. If we make her sit in her chair then she screams. Even swatting her hand doesn’t work (we’ve done this so often that she’s taken to swatting her own hand with her fork or spoon and saying “No, No” with a smile on her face) so we end up walking around with her. Well, the same thing happened Sunday, Mother’s Day, and I was spent when we got home and took a two hour nap.

Monday, round two with Chris. For some reason my simple request of drawing a picture and writing a few sentences about the trip we took to the Medieval Castle sent him into a tail spin. He got irate (which in turn caused me to blow up), and we yelled at each other. He informed me that he HATES to write and that he shouldn’t have to do work in the summer. Now easy going Joey (7) happily drew a picture and wrote a sentence and was even excited about showing me his finished product. I got incredibly discouraged at this battle with Chris and started imagining what homeschooling would be like. Could I make this child, who functioned obediently to the request of the teacher, see me as educator and do what I asked?

I went from extremes in a matter of minutes. I decided to require very little of him and absolutely do nothing educational this summer. I also decided that I would have to relax my standards even though I know he was capable of so much educationally. Then I went to talk with him and asked him to write (this was before I realized how much he hated writing), in his journal about his behavior. This set him off again and I “resigned” to send him to public school and let him be someone else’s problem. Then I also thought of putting him on the ADHD drugs to fix the problem and then I thought, well maybe it’s ME who needs the drugs!

Well, in the end we talked it through and I got an idea of what he hates about writing and we agreed that in his many journals next year he would only be required to draw a picture and write one sentence. I agreed to lay off the “education” this summer. Though I will present journal opportunities to him and his brother I would require nothing of him (except reading during the summer). But I made it clear that I expect him to be ready to work in the fall.

So here I am torn between my plans and agendas for their education and the de-schooling theory. My biggest fear is if I don’t have a detailed plan, nothing will get done. I know myself. I start out all fired up and then I sizzle. I’m more of a sprinter, not the marathon type. So I need a plan. I can’t just wing it.

But I also am realizing it’s okay to have that plan but I can’t expect to do it all. It’s not going to work with Chris. I also have to realize that more important than his education is our relationship, our home and the peace and family unity I want to strengthen and grow through homeschooling. It’s so easy to write down all my hopes and dreams for a happy, harmonious year, but in reality I know how short my fuse is.

We’ve come a long way, yet still have far to go! Glad I don’t have to make the journey alone!

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As this year of homeschooling comes to an end, I thought it would be fun and interesting to take a trip down memory lane. So I’ll be posting a series of homeschool posts from my past (old dead blog) every Thursday and reflecting on what I’ve written and if things have really changed. It should be an educating journey.

Reposted from May 2004

I seem to find the best books on the discount tables at book stores. My latest God send is a book entitled Raising Your Spirited Child Workbook. I actually found it at a FREE book benevolence for homeschooling moms and since my kids are out of school I guess it’s official. I’m a homeschooler!

So far this book has helped me determine (through tests in the book) that I am a spirited mom raising FOUR very spirited children. Though they all have their areas in which they are more intense and spirited, they all are a handful. (Did I mention I was homeshooling in the fall!! Help!)

Next I’m determining whether they are introverts or extroverts which will help me help them “recharge.” I’m definitely and introvert who needs space, time and QUIET!!! My two most spirited kids Chris (9) and Grace (2), I believe are extroverts and the two in the middle Joey (7) and Timmy (4) are introverts who really enjoy spending hours alone. Joey loves crafts and would forsake a family event to recharge with his crafts while Timmy can regularly have meltdowns if he doesn’t have quiet time to play. Last night while I was reading to Joey in my bed, Timmy chose to play by himself in his room. No coaxing could get him away from his play.

So needless to say I’m excited and learning alot.

I need to revisit this book. But as far as I can tell, my observations were right on. Though I haven’t been encouraging my introverts to have quiet times like I know they need and I’m not totally sure Timmy is an introvert. Though Joey and I determined from the book The Treasure Tree, that all four of my kids have the four different personalities.

Chris (12) and first born is the Lion of the group. The Choleric, taking charge even when others don’t want him to.

Joey (10), the creative one, is the Melancholy or Beaver. Though he has alot of Sanguine in him as well (Otter.) I know the personality experts swear you cannot be a Melancholy AND Sanguine, so we’ll see if his personality traits strengthen and develop into one area over the other. He’s very creative but NOT organized. If he wasn’t such a hands on person, I’d say he leans toward a Sanguine. When he was younger I would have pegged him for a Melancholy Phlegmatic. Maybe birth order has something to do with it as well.

Timmy (7) is the Golden Retriever. Steady Eddy Phlegmatic. He’s loyal and faithful and willing to please. But don’t cross him. He’s got a ferocious bite!

Grace (5) is Sanguine party girl! The Otter who only wants to have fun and doesn’t care if she bugs the heck out of her brothers. It’s funny to her! She’s got more personality in her little finger than most kids have in their own body. I often tell people, “God had to make her cute because if she wasn’t she’d be in BIG trouble!”

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I know if you’ve read my blog for any length of time you’d know those two words DO NOT go together. But it’s been a long time since I’ve felt this peaceful about my kids education. And the reason may be because we’re planning to send them back to a private school.

It’s a Classical Christian school that has a small family like feel with 8-12 kids in each class. They’re less rigid than the boys’ last school and more flexible, plus they big into the arts.

We were only planning on sending Chris (12) and Joey (10), but the other school I had picked out for the younger two is full. So I’m open to sending Timmy (7) especially since the school answered all my objections and is planning to fix the things I was most concerned about.

That leaves me with Grace! I really don’t want to homeschool her, yet I don’t want to send her to an all day kindergarten. She’s on two waiting lists for different two day a week kindergartens, but I have to make other plans just in case. So since she’s a young five year old, I thought of sending her back to preschool (so I could get a break two days a week) and homeschooling her the rest of the days.

I know she needs more time with me, but I also know I can’t homeschool her like I’d like to. So I may have to take it slow and make it fun!

So for this next year I have a peace about NOT homeschooling and this is the first time I can actually say that. Plus, the great thing about this new school is they have homeschooling options once the kids are in 7th grade. So they can keep their new friends, and take homeschool classes there and still be a part of the drama program. But that’s two years away, and way too soon to be worrying about that!

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Reposted from May 2004

I’ve been really frustrated with Chris (9) lately. He seems so distracted lately and even when I give him simple instructions like “Go straight to your room” he dawdles along the way or forgets and sits down to play the piano. Yesterday it was just one thing after the other so today I began my ADHD search on the web. I came across this Bill of Rights for Misunderstood Kids. It’s something I’m going to blow up and have framed in my “school room” this fall! In the mean time, I’ll try to remember to read it often!

Well, I never did blow up that bill of rights, but with age Chris has matured. We still struggle with being distracted, but not as bad. Now my focus needs to be on my whiny ten year old. Lord, help me!

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HOMESCHOOL REFLECTIONS

As this year of homeschooling comes to an end, I thought it would be fun and interesting to take a trip down memory lane. So I’ll be posting a series of homeschool posts from my past (old dead blog) and reflecting on what I’ve written and if things have really changed every Thursday. It should be an educating journey.

April 2004
Even though my kids are still in the first and 3rd grade, I’m doing alot of research on curriculum and books for next year. This is what I have decided so far… I reserve the right to change my mind at any time! I went to a local book drive and got four boxes of bookd for free. So for this first year my decsions for science and history are based on what I was able to get for FREE.

Saxon Math 65 & 43
Easy Grammar/Plus
Spelling Power
A Combo of Rod & Staff and ABeka Science.
History: BJU… I’m still looking for some good Ancient History books
Latin: undecided curriculum but very easy for a 2nd and 4th grader to comprehend.
Konos Character studies… obedience, patience, orderliness, attentiveness ( I will cover many of these over the summer and then review in fall)

Books to read:
20,000 Leagues Under the Sea by Jules Verne (Treasury of Illustrated Classics)
Moby Dick by Herman Melville (TIC)
Avalanche by Ron Roy
Swiss Family Robinson by Johann David Wyss (Abridged)
The Sign of the Beaver by Elizabeth George Speare
The Indian in the Cupboard by Lynne Reid Banks
The Trumpet Swan by E.B. Whit
Helen Keller

I’ll be doing a Civil War unit Charley Skedaddle by Patricia Beatty and Behind Rebel Lines are books used in this study. Other Civil War books we will read are:

Across Five Aprils by Irene Hunt (Newberry Medal)

Bull Run by Paul Fleishman

Other books we own and may read this year are: (TIC)

Call of the Wild by Jack London (we also have the movie)

Robinson Crusoe By Daniel Defoe

Adventures of Huckleberry Finn by Mark Twain

Well those of my plans so far. But as we all know, “The best laid plans of mice and Men often go ary.”

Needless to say, I was an eager beaver. Though we stayed on track with Saxon Math (though it took my oldest over a year to complete 6/5) we never got around to Spelling Power.

We tried and ditched Latin, Konos, and wasn’t quite thorough with ABeka science, though I did hit science heavily the first year and then backed off a bit on the second and third years. In fact, we hit history hard the first year also, but then again I was only homeschooling two kids.

We read a lot of the books, but never got around to the Civil War. In fact, we’re just hitting the Westward exspansion this summer. We traded off with Ancient History first semester and American History the second semester that’s why we’re a little behind in American History. Plus we hit the French and Indian War real hard, which I doubt the schools even touch on.

This summer we’ll be reading the Revolutionary War stories by Nancy Rue which will hopefully propell us into the Westward expansion and the Little House series. I just wish Grace was old enough to enjoy these stories!

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HOMESCHOOL REFLECTIONS

As this year of homeschooling comes to an end, I thought it would be fun and interesting to take a trip down memory lane. So I’ll be posting a series of homeschool posts from my past (old dead blog) and reflecting on what I’ve written and if things have really changed every Thursday. It should be an educating journey.

March 2004
I’ve been very busy writing my novel and reading and planning for homeschooling next year. I’m getting excited about the education aspect, but I’m still concerned about the whole getting along thing. Chris (9) just went through a bunch of different tests from I.Q. to learning tests in order to better help us understand him. I want to know if I’m dealing with a gifted child, an ADHD child or a normal boy with tons of energy. I’m also hoping to find out what his learning style is. I think it’s Auditory/Visual/Kinesthetic. We meet with the doctor tomorrow so I’ll try and update this week, but if you want to keep up with what’s happening I suggest you sign up for the mailing list. I’m very busy lately and won’t be writing very often.

Well, it’s three years after that test which we learned that our normal energetic boy was gifted (129 IQ) with 60% impulsive ADHD.

Has it helped me any in homeschooling him? A little because now I have to stop and determine whether he’s just ignoring my instructions or really forgetting and getting distracted. Has it changed the way I parent him? Not much, though I’m sure it should. I do offer him tons more grace because of it, though it’s hard to know when to tighten the reigns because he’s really smart and good at manipulating like “we’ll you didn’t exactly say I couldn’t listen to music while I did my school work.”

We’re still dealing with the same issues as before, but he’s matured a lot and through all the tears and struggles and fights, we’ve become closer. I’m not afraid to apologize to him, and he’s not afraid to hold my hand in public.

Though working on son number one did have a negative effect on son number two. It seems like I neglected Joey a bit and I need to devote more time to him who seems to have the typical middle kid syndrome. Big brother antagonizes him to no end, and little brother is sometimes his buddy, sometimes not. Joey is going through a big emotional whinny phase and it’s time I focus more of my energy on him. So this summer I’ll try and work on that relationship
Whether homeschooling or not, a mother’s work is never done!

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HOMESCHOOL REFLECTIONS

As this year of homeschooling comes to an end, I thought it would be fun and interesting to take a trip down memory lane. So I’ll be posting a series of homeschool posts from my past (old dead blog) and reflecting on what I’ve written and if things have really changed every Thursday. It should be an educating journey.

March 2004
That’s right! The one thing I said I would never do I am going to do, so remember never say never. I think God likes the challenge of the word NEVER. The Bible does say all things are possible with God and it’s a good thing because God’s going to have to do the impossible. He’s going to have to give me divine patience and wisdom and patience and self-control and patience… to homeschool my two boys next year.

I have mixed feelings about it all. I’m a little intimidated academically, but moreso I’m terrified about the possible conflicts. For example, it’s no secret I have an issue with my anger. No, I don’t throw things or beat people up, it’s just my mouth says things without thinking and the way I say it comes out is yelling. Tonight for instance, I ate dinner early so I could hide away up stairs to work on my writing project. Well, I was in a most pleasant place… in the middle of a scene in my novel when my overly tired, overly sensitive three-year-old son came bursting through the door with a roar. Yes, a roar. Well, needless to say, I was startled and was pulled prematurely from my peaceful environment, and I let out a startled yell. Yes, my heart was pounding and he did scare me and I was mad, but I also knew how sensitive he was so I down played the anger and up played the “You scared me!” Timmy thought it was funny like any normal 3 year old. Me, I wondered where the darling hubby was.

Well, as Timmy was leaving the room and I was entering back into my peaceful recluse, he knocks over a wooden folding chair and it crashes to the ground sending my nerves and temper through the roof. You guessed it, I yelled! I didn’t mean to, it just came out. And I knew I was gonna pay. Timmy let out a cry and yelled back, “Don’t scream at me!” and he runs out of the room and locks himslef in the bathroom. When he gets insulted or is overly sensitive about something there is no comforting him. Of course I felt really awful and could no longer write. So I try to talk to him, but he wants nothing to do with me. Enter darling hubby, finally.

But he can’t comfort Timmy either. Somehow Timmy gets out of the bathroom and is distracted by funny words and silliness and eventually I carry him to my bed… and he escapes my room several times still obviously hurt. He says he wants to sit on his bed. So I reluctantly let him and quietly sob into my pillow. He comes back in after a while, and we snuggle and apologize to each other.

All’s well that ends well. Or is it? This isn’t the first time I’ve yelled and it just breaks my heart to see his reaction, but things don’t change overnight. I pray. I sin again. Then I ask for forgiveness and I’m forgiven. I know it’s a process, I just wish that God would do one quick work on my heart and get it over with.

Sometimes I look at my life and see no change, other times I can measure my growth. Sad to say my issues with anger have not changed much except that now I know what triggers it and it’s usually hormonal. I discovered this the first year homeschooling. Some weeks the littlest things would set me off, other weeks major stuff didn’t seem to bother me. The difference was WHEN the stress hit. Since then I’ve gone to a doctor who’s been able to measure my stress level and test which systems in my body are under stress or not functioning 100%. Then he suggests vitamins and herbal supplements to help. And honestly, I can see the difference when I forget to take my vitamins and more importantly my family see the difference.

So though things aren’t perfect, they’re foreseeable and preventable and when I do get over stressed and out of control, I quickly apologize and blame it on the hormones. My boys forgive me and seem to understand!

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