Quick Fiction Fixes – Utilize character point of view to show emotion
We’re all busy, whether working full-time or chasing/chauffeuring kids around all day. Yet we’re also writers, striving to get our words on paper and then polish it to a sparkle.
This column gives quick fixes for fiction manuscripts specifically for busy writers. Pick and choose what works best for you!
Utilize Point of View:
Each character in your book will have a different way of describing things pertaining to themselves and the world around them.
It’s no less for their emotions.
Your manly ex-Navy SEAL isn’t going to describe his surprise as a gasp and a fluttering in his chest. He’s going to feel like a hollow-point copperhead has slugged him in the gut.
Likewise, your small farming town preacher’s daughter isn’t going to describe the heated family argument as the headache-inducing staccato clamor of Chinese grandmothers at the San Francisco Chinatown fish market. She’ll describe the sounds as the fierce pelting of hailstones echoing in an empty barn, resonating in her skull as if they were falling on her head instead of the roof.
When describing your character’s emotions, think about their gender, backgrounds, experiences. Make the emotions you describe specific and unique to that character’s personality and backstory.
Your character’s thoughts can be a fabulous way to not only convey information, but to convey intense emotions. The key is to take advantage of point of view.
Setup: Laura is in a new church, and she’d filled out a Visitor’s card when she first entered the doors. Now, at the end of the service, the worship leader has been given her card.
“Laura Duke? Are you here? Please stand up so we can greet you!” He smiled as if conveying a Publisher’s Clearing House check to her.
Oh, how embarrassing. Laura slowly rose with a small smile.
The church members turned to look at her, then sat back in their seats. No warm smiles—okay, maybe one from that lady in the corner with the Coke-bottle lenses. Nothing more than a few disinterested glances.
She sat down again as fast as possible. That was horrible.
Instead of telling her emotion, you can show it with the nature of her thoughts—with her tone, with the language and words.
“Laura Duke? Are you here? Please stand up so we can greet you!” He smiled as if conveying a Publisher’s Clearing House check to her.
No way. Aw, man, this was not happening. Who thought up this kind of pain and torture? Did they not want her to return ever again?
Laura slowly rose with a small smile.
The church members turned to look at her, then sat back in their seats. No warm smiles—okay, maybe one from that lady in the corner with the Coke-bottle lenses. Nothing more than a few disinterested glances.
She sat down again as fast as possible. God, if the Second Coming came right now, I’d be pretty happy.
Go through your manuscript and immerse yourself as a reader in your viewpoint character. Do you feel his/her feelings? Are you using point of view to best advantage? What are their thoughts like—in character? Telling or showing their emotions?
