You Want Me to Speak? But I’m a Writer…

Everyone has their calling.

For as long as God deems it, mine is writing and encouraging women in their faith. Some people are gifted at doing multiple things – such as writing and speaking. I don’t enjoy speaking. Yet for whatever reasons, God seems to keep pulling me out of my comfort zone.

It started when I was asked to lead a table at a Bible studies. I was horrible the first time I did it. Not very smooth at all and just really nervous. Then I was asked again and I thought, “Do they know what they’re doing?” I thought I was bad, but okay – if God wants me to do this then I’ll do it again.

Then I had to step aside briefly, and I missed it. I thought, “Lord if you ask this of me again, even though I’m not sure it’s my gift, I’ll be obedient and do it again.” Sure enough – I was asked to speak at an online conference. I spoke, but again felt I did terrible. Could they tell I was reading off of a paper? How can anyone remember what to say without reading it?

This year, I was asked to be a mentor for a young mom’s group at our church. I was honored since the mentors were hand-picked. After only a couple of meetings, I was asked to give a devotional at the following month’s meeting. Sheer panic went through my heart. I kept thinking, “I’m a WRITER, not a speaker!” I went home and after talking to God, decided that I would again be obedient.

I heard someone once say that if they did well, they won and if they failed, they still won because they were doing what God wanted them to do. That became my mantra.

I still feelmy main calling is writing. I don’t have desires to go into a speaking ministry or lecture. I love talking to women one on one. There’s something about feeling inadequate and uncomfortable standing in front of people that gets to me. But each new thing I obey God on, my confidence in myself grows. It doesn’t really matter how well I did, but just that I obeyed Him.

My writing is a ministry. And as long as it is, I need to obey the one in charge of that ministry. God. If God wants me to stay on a small level, I’ll stay small. If He wants me to go into areas I hadn’t thought of on my own and take me out of my comfort zone, then I’ll go outside of my comfort zone. Because He’s the one who knows best how to reach His people.

And that’s truly all I want.

~ Dionna Sanchez is the Founder of http://www.EmphasisOnMoms.com and blogs her faith at http://beautyinthestorm.blogspot.com. She is a freelance writer and raises her two girls from her home in Idaho- until the day calls her somewhere warmer.