#AngelWarz – Prologue

Sounds dangerous, right?  Foreboding and a bit ominous, but if it wasn’t then there really wouldn’t be a story to tell. And it all works out okay in the end. I’m not talking they all live happily ever after okay, because really, have you actually read the Bible? It’s full of all kinds of disturbing stuff, but things do turn out okay. Eventually.  

A long time ago in the heavens far far away, one third of God’s angels, led by Lucifer (aka Satan, Bielzebub, The Old Serpent, The 1st Gym Teacher ever) were booted out of heaven by Michael because Lucifer decided he could run heaven better than God. We don’t know how old Lucifer was when he rebelled against his Father, but we figure 13 or 14.

Kids these days, right?

Anyway, all these angels that had been expelled from their cushy homes above were mulling around Earth, sulking and angry, just doing nasty stuff to humans because Earth didn’t have satellite TV or the internet yet. 

Boooooooored out of their minds, they were.

So one of them got the bright idea that they should marry the human women. “It’ll be cool!” the Fallen said. “We can make ’em fix our dinner and stuff!”

Apparently they didn’t have delivery pizza or take out yet, either. 

So they marry the human women. So far so good. Even though these women burnt their dinners and kept pestering them to share their feelings. Which really wasn’t a good idea. Um, you know, that whole rebellious fallen angel thing they had going on. Best to keep it to themselves. 

And since they were married, and there was no ESPN, and they weren’t about to utter anything more than “what’s for dinner,” they had kids. Which, you might not think is all too terrible, except it was against the rules for angels to have kids with humans. But they’d already been expelled from heaven. How much worse could it get?

But Michael, being the stand up Archangel he was, did a facepalm and hopped right down to Earth to clean up this mess before it got all the way to the NBA (which he obviously failed because…you know…Michael Jordan).

Michael (the angel, not the basketball player) tried, though. He brought his starting angels with him. No benchwarmers here.  Yeah, I know, you’re thinking sweet white robed angels with cute little play swords and harps as they fluttered their way to earth on feathery wings.

Fuhgetaboutit.

These were. Bad. Angels. 

But even Michael’s crack troops couldn’t keep up with the spread of angel-human babies. So after a thousand years-give or take-of hunting down the Spawn of the Fallen, Michael decided he’d spent too much time on this project. After all, he had other stuff on his to-do list.

The names of these Spawn of the Fallen were Sheshai, Ahiman, and Talmai.

Sheshai was the strongest. And he had a knack for self-preservation. Caleb had chased off his Fallen brothers, but had Sheshai at the tip of his sword. Tired, sweaty, and late for dinner, Caleb just wanted to finish off Sheshai and be done with it.

But Sheshai cried out (they did a lot of crying out in bible times), “Please spare me and my children!”

Caleb did an eye-roll. “And why would I do that?”

So Sheshai pulls out his Day Planner and makes a suggestion. “I’ll help you round up all the other Spawn of the Fallen if you’ll spare my son.”  He consulted the Day Planner. “Give me a week maybe?”

Now Caleb was no fool. He was tired of chasing these guys. So he made a grand pronouncement: “Fine.”

Caleb repeated this to Sheshai.

What choice did Sheshai have? He filled in his Day Planner with “busy” from that moment until the End of Days, which was exactly six thousand and-

Sorry, got called to dinner.

Where were we? Oh yes, Sheshai and his son and all their offspring had to spend all their days hunting the Spawn. Naturally, the other Fallen, Ahiman, Talmai, and their offspring, heard about this and knew they’d been punked. So Sheshai and his offspring were not only hated by Michael, the good angels, and humans, but by their own tribe! 

Talk about never having a place to sit in the school cafeteria. Definitely your loner, stoner, psycho in training material.

So back to Sheshai. He had to eat at a lunch table by himself for…like…ever. And his kids, well no hanging out with the other Fallen kids at Starbucks. The other Fallen couldn’t kill Sheshai either, so that was a pretty cool perk. But they and their brats could kill Sheshai’s offspring. Sucks for them.

More importantly, Sheshai’s offspring were stronger and under strict orders to hunt down and kill the offspring of Ahiman and Talmai.

Got all that? There’ll be a test next week. JK. What you really need to know is this: the Fallen are still here. They live among us and even think they are one of us until around their 12th birthday. They’re split into three factions. One faction, from Sheshai, is forever condemned to hunt and kill the other two factions from Ahiman and Talmai.

The first day of middle school.