Quick Fiction Fixes – Deep POV
We’re all busy, whether working full-time or chasing/chauffeuring kids around all day. Yet we’re also writers, striving to get our words on paper and then polish it to a sparkle.
This column gives quick fixes for fiction manuscripts specifically for busy writers. Pick and choose what works best for you!
Deep Point of View
Only ten or fifteen years ago, it was accepted practice for writers to use omniscient point of view. This distanced the reader from the characters, but it also allowed the omniscient narrator to comment on the thoughts and feelings of all the characters in each scene, and not just the principle character.
These days, editors seem to prefer the use of “limited third person” point of view, also referred to as “deep POV.” This means that the entire scene is from the limited point of view of just one character. The reader never sees what’s in the head of any other character except what can be inferred from body language or dialogue.
There’s a debate about limited third person versus “head-hopping,” but I’m not going to go into it here. Suffice it to say that in general, the use of head-hopping in an unpublished manuscript is often thought to be a mark of amateur writing.
However, it’s not enough to just not head-hop when you write. You want to utilize deep POV to its fullest potential.
Point of view done skillfully can kick a scene up a notch with powerful results. As a writer, take full advantage of deep POV and make your reader truly experience the scene through the character’s eyes.
One of the best ways to draw the reader closer to the point of view character is a very quick, easy fix.
In general, any use of “felt,” “heard,” “saw,” etc. borders on “telling” and draws the reader out of the character’s deep POV. You can usually get rid of these words and phrases, and it serves to tighten the prose, making it more vibrant and emotional.
For example:
He saw her exit the car and furtively glance around the dark parking lot. He noticed a strange ring on her right hand that sparkled in the street lamp light.
versus
She exited the car and furtively glanced around the dark parking lot. A strange ring on her right hand sparkled in the street lamp light.
He understood how much this would mean to her. He knew she’d be worried.
versus
This would mean a lot to her. She’d be worried.
He prayed she’d understand why he did what he did. He could only hope she wouldn’t walk away.
versus
Lord, please help her understand why I had to do it. She wouldn’t walk away, would she?
You might want to go through your novel to seek and destroy those kinds of verbs. Although they’re action verbs, they distance the reader from the character. By getting rid of them and rewriting the sentences, you can draw the reader closer to the characters to feel their emotions more, to draw them into the character’s point of view.
