Recreating Your Extraordinary Life: How to Move Foward After Disaster Hits

I thought I was through the darkest season of my life. Like I had just surfaced after nearly drowning after being tossed and turned by the waves. The clouds had finally cleared and the warmth of the sun on my face offered new hope at living my extraordinary life. But before I could bask in the sun, I heard a rumble in the distance. The biggest wave of all. not of my own making for once, headed my way, and I was powerless to stop it.

I had gotten really good at reframing my circumstances instead of blaming the world for my troubles. But this tidal wave looming in the distance kept picking up speed. As it approached with ferocity, the weight of hopelessness wrapped around me like an anchor pulling me to the bottom of the sea. How was I going to live an extraordinary life if I had to spend the rest of my life as my mom’s caregiver? That thought weighed heavy on me as I watched the “dementia” wave approach, and all my dreams slowly slip away… again. I knew I couldn’t survive this one.

Now I know that’s a pretty dramatic opening, but if you’ve ever felt like you were helpless and hopeless with all you’ve worked for slipping away, then you’ll understand the emotion (so real and powerful) can blind you to the light of truth.

During this most recent realization, that the time had come for me to step in and take care of my mom, I struggled with a God who could send me little messages of hope to keep swimming, but not the big “lifesaver” I needed to stay afloat. I’ll be honest and say I got pretty angry and down realizing once again, I would have to find the strength to get through another storm alone.

That weight of hopelessness, for what the future would hold for me and my mom, had a good hold on me. I was being pulled under, dooming myself to a life I couldn’t get excited about. I was of grieving the death of my extraordinary life.

The negative thoughts of what the future “would” hold for me and my mom was like an anchor of despair pulling me down. I knew I had a choice to make. I could let it bury me at the bottom of the sea, or I would loosen the ropes and swim to the surface, and find the strength and joy to swim for shore.

I had to accept that what I envisioned for my future would now look different. But different didn’t have to be a life sentence. Different could be beautiful. Click to tweet.

In fact, I had learned how to create an extraordinary life in the midst of the storm, so I could do it again. And that’s what I’ve determined to do, but how?

1. Allow yourself to grieve the loss of a dream.
   I struggled with feeling selfish for focusing on my loss, and not my mom’s. But I realized that I needed to deal with my own grief before I could create something new for both of us. Feel whatever emotions surface, and don’t stuff them or else you might get stuck in the grief cycle.
2. Allow yourself to hope again.
3. Allow yourself to dream new dreams
4. Make a plan and work towards your new extraordinary life.
5. Realize God has a Plan and Rest in that!
6. Enjoy your extraordinary life where ever it takes you!